bbspy

What do you like about Britain?
I love everything about Britain. I love the culture, I love the Queen and the monarchy. I am a secret Anglophile because I was married to a Brit and we had a house off the Kings Road and I learnt how to drive on the other side of the street. If I married a Lord would I be Lady Dick? That would be good.

It’s UK v USA. Are you quite patriotic?
I think there are great things that both countries have to offer. I am very patriotic. I love any man or woman who serves the armed forces for a democracy, to make the world a better place.

You’ve got a lot of experience of reality TV. Does that mean you have nothing to worry about here?
I don’t have a clue what I’m doing which I suppose is the beauty of it. I know that it is a fantastic show and I am looking forward to a wonderful experience and meeting new friends. Maybe I could be the lucky one!

Why do you want to do the show?
To have a fantastic experience, the best ever. I love coming to Great Britain. I love it when it rains because it never rains in Beverly Hills, California, darling! I love it because your skin is better and the roses grow. I’m a gardener and I wish we had this rain in LA!

What will you bring to the house?
I just want to bring my experience and strength and hope that I win and that I can make new friends and be of service to anyone who needs mentoring. I am not a backstabber. My take no prisoners attitude of shape up or ship out will not stand for anyone slagging anyone off. I think there are great qualities in most people.

Are you nervous?
Before I left, my friends and family were all more nervous than I was. I don’t get nervous, I pack at the last moment. I am happy to have a little away time and I’m lucky enough to be included in Big Brother.

So what will you miss most?
My dogs. I have an English Labrador – his name is Chester – and I have Bella – my English Bulldog. Being in bed with them is like a snoring fart-fest. I have been told that I snore so that will be disgusting for other people!

Do you have any other bad habits?
I pick a lot. I’m like an ape. I have attention deficit so it’s a surprise I can even answer this question. I’ve done every show on earth except for this one and I think it’s going to be cool. I have lived in a microcosm with other people who have liked me and great friends have come out of it and there are people who haven’t liked me. I even miss the people who haven’t liked me. We’re all just sardines in a can. You’re not going to see me naked even though I am a nudist at home. My modest fiancé, Doctor Rocky is always getting me to button up my clothes. I am very glamorous so I guess I will miss the privacy of masturbating in private.

Will you maintain your glam look in the house?
I love to be glamorous and I love playing dress up. That is why I became the world’s first supermodel – to escape in the photograph, shot by the greatest photographers who have lived and are still living. I love fashion. It is in me and it is what I love to do, so I guess I will be glamorous in the house.

You must have some amazing stories. What do people usually want to tout?
Well, a lot of times people ask about who I have had sex with and plastic surgery, which are two redundant questions. I don’t like being famous. I really don’t. The only perks are getting a good seat in a restaurant. Paparazzi are at my door morning, noon and night and sometimes it is a hindrance. Everyone now wants a selfie and I always take selfies with people. I have never turned down a person for a selfie because that was once me. My very first modelling job was in Morocco. I saw Sean Connery and I was so happy to see James Bond sitting there. I went up to him and said “excuse me Mr Connery but my mother would really like an autograph” and he told me to “f*ck off.” I was so hurt I was crying. I turned around and walked away and a man came up and said, ‘I’m not famous in the least or an a**hole like that guy” and it turned out to be Sir Michael Caine and he signed an autograph and I thought that was really sweet.

Will you pass your experience on to people in the house?
I have got plenty of advice. I mentored Abbey Clancy and look at her now. But I was tough on her. I’m tough on people. I just expect things to be organised. What you see is what you get.

Do you think you intimidate people?
I don’t think so because people really like me. I am proud of who I am. I have made a lot of mistakes but I am only 60. Enjoy your youth, enjoy life, it’s so much fun. You either like to hate me or hate to love me, but people generally know that there is no bullshit with me. I am a straight shooter and I speak unedited.

Will that get you in trouble in the house?
What could I possibly do? If I haven’t got into trouble by now, how could I possibly get into trouble in the house? Only saying things to be malicious, that’s not who I am. I’m not going to get naked, I’m not going to have sex, so maybe I’m not even that interesting.

How will you celebrate winning?
If I win that’s great, that would be amazing. If I lose, I lose, but may the best person win. I hope it’s going to be me but if not then it wasn’t meant to be. I’ll give it my best shot and hopefully I will be the winner, but I am not that competitive really.